How do you define Freedom?
I had a dear friend share a Tik Tok with me and these verses have continued to pop back up in my head again and again in the past few days. Recently, I have had conversations about freedom and how do I or anyone else define freedom? Do we run to freedom or do we run away from existence constantly seeking freedom only to never find it? These verses reminded me of where I find my freedom. The freedom of not having to look back, of being defined by all that has passed but knowing that I am defined by what God has called me to become. Constantly moving forward knowing and trusting in what God has planned for me. The emptiness, the lack of freedom becomes filled. Letting go of what is behind me releases me from any constriction I may feel, or any limits I may have in becoming what God has planned for me. “Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:12-14, NIV).
Quit ignoring the signs
Today was a sad day. I received difficult news yesterday about an unexpected loss in one of my teams and the ongoing recognition that things are far from where I thought I would be in my personal life in so many areas. I cried a lot, I smiled little, but I continued to stand bold in my faith-in spite of all that is being thrown at me. But this is not a sad post, it is a post of heightened awareness, recognition of signs, and the determination not to ignore them. I shared that this past weekend I took time to be deep in prayer and refocus on studying His word. I have been fasting and remaining focused opening myself to hear Him, hear His truth above all else. The signs have been overwhelming not only in their multitude but in the immediacy of direct answer to prayers. I mean, yay God! In the last two days, I have held my bible in prayer and just fervently asked God to reveal Himself to me. I have begged Him to let me know that I am hearing Him and not being deceived by other influences. Yesterday, as I prayed, I opened my bible and it opened to Isaiah 43. I was reminded that God is with me - “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze…Do not be afraid for I am with you” (Isaiah 43: 2-5, NIV).
Never stop praising and trusting God
I am thankful for the desire to be open and the platform that enables me to share-the good days, and the hard days. This weekend was a time of reflection, reset, and prayer. I can’t wait to share the many affirmations received yesterday as I have been fasting and focused on continuous and intentional prayer. I took time to step away from all else and focus on God, to go to my Bible, to seek God’s guidance and to trust Him in all things. And then, the little things happened-let’s just call them Godwinks! Directly following my blog yesterday where I shared that sometimes I wished I could see God working in my own household, I received a message about an opportunity for Helena to work with a Producer in digital animation-a blessing in my household. I put out an all call to my prayer warriors and the issue that was weighing on me that led to seeking help in that moment was answered with a text 30 minutes later…it is not complete healing, it is not fully done, but it is a start. And then, I am reminded of the blessing that I have in my community-the people who reach out to me and remind me that God does not fail, God does not leave. A dear friend shared that even as David was being pursued by Saul and in the most difficult of times, he said “Be exalted, O God, above the heavens; let your glory be over all the earth…My heart, O God, is steadfast, my heart is steadfast; I will sing and make music. Awake, my Soul! Awake, harp and lyre! I will awaken the dawn. I will praise you, Lord, among the nations; I will sing of you among the peoples. For great is your love, reaching to the heavens; your faithfulness reaches the skies” (Psalms 57 5-10, NIV).
How do I trust God when things are hard?
Today, I sense a kindred spirit in Job. As I read this morning, I was reminded of the dearest gift of my prayer warriors and the recognition of the greatness of God-who am I to question His power or His plans? Job reminds us that not all that happens in life is cause and effect but that there is peace when you trust in God-even in the hardest days. I sit here questioning why things are happening and realizing that I may never know the why. This is not for me to “fix”, no matter how hard the day may seem, I am not standing alone. God still has me-when all else feels taken away, He has never left. Job finally receives blessings twice the level of what he had before. Even after Job had gone through all his troubles, God comes to Him and Job responds “I know that you can do all things; no purpose of yours can be thwarted” (Job 42: 2, NIV). What a way to glorify God to see the turn in the life of Job. Time and again I remind myself in my prayer that it is not for my earthly needs and desires but for the Glory of God. Who am I to not trust in God in the hard days?
A friend closer than a brother
I received a note today from one of my dear friends in Tanzania. Our shared experience on Mt. Kilimanjaro will connect us for a lifetime. I shared the end of the story on that mountain, but it all started on day one when Shaphy was identified as my “mountain warrior” that would help set up the tent so it was ready by the time we got to camp. I might have been a bit resistant to the help when we started, we can blame that on a bit of pride and ego. One of the following days, Shaphy met me on the trail as we were coming into camp and offered to grab my pack, again, a bit of pride and ego-I had this. Then came another day, a harder day, and this time when Shaphy met me on the trail, our guide encouraged to hand him my pack, he is just here to help. This same young man was the one that ran over 2,000 feet up from base camp to bring me the life saving oxygen tank. He always had the most joyful spirit, always with a smile-on that day, I saw the fear in his eyes as well as everyone else’s eyes on the mountain. Days later, as we gathered at the hotel, all our smiles returned knowing the experience we shared would forever connect us. He became a friend closer than a brother and we have kept in touch. “One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother” (Proverbs 18:24, NIV). What a blessing that an event that could have been tragic led to lifelong friendships.
Put God first
I am blessed to have two jobs that I love and that give me the opportunity to engage with a large group of people. This week, I had some unexpected encounters from both my civilian job and my military job. Both encounters were not about my jobs or my work, but about my blog. I am always moved when I run in to people that share they read my blog or share it with their families. I am especially encouraged when the feedback comes from people of all ages and backgrounds. I had an earlier encounter with my civilian job and then, at the end of the week, I had a couple of encounters in my military job. I had two women come up to me encouraged that I am so open about my faith, even in such a senior position in the military. By seeing me open in my faith, they are encouraged to be open about their faith. How amazing is our God that my writing would encourage others to be bold in their faith. As Paul stated, when we put God first and listen to our calling, when we are bold in our faith, we exalt Him in all we do. “I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or death” (Philippians 1:20, NIV).
Not on my bingo card
I think “Not on my bingo card” is going to be my motto for 2026. It doesn’t have a negative or positive definition, it is simply things that happen that make me scratch my head and go-”nope, that one wasn’t on my bingo card.” Last night was one of those nights. Helena and I went with some friends to watch a Banana Ball Series and had an amazing time. While in the parking garage and getting ready to head home, I received a text message from home with a photo of his bloody shirt holding one of our pups saying “send help.”
Declare his glory
A day late, I know! I might have been a little occupied yesterday bringing my new car home. After taking everyone for a drive, I was exhausted and decided to go to sleep and catch up today! I had the chance to travel up North to one of our training sites today and spent the day engaging with teammates. I love the way conversations take their own special journey when you let it flow freely. Conversations ranged from PTSD and suicide prevention, to favorite flavors of ice cream, to drab color selection of shirts for our teammates. In the middle of one of these random chats, someone shared that he and his wife read my blog. I continue to be in awe of how many people far and wide continue to find my blog interesting and give me encouragement to keep writing. God reminds us to “Sing to the Lord, all the earth; proclaim his salvation day after day. Declare his glory among the nations, his marvelous deeds among all peoples” (1 Chronicles 16:23-24, NIV). I love these verses, especially the call to proclaim his salvation day after day. Today, regular conversations led to discussion about the blog, a pilgrimage in Spain for El Camino, and how miraculous healing has come to many who struggle with PTSD and suicide ideation. That was just one day-imagine what we all could do to declare his glory if we all had days like today…everyday.
Thankfully, a sunny day
I acknowledge we have been suffering through a drought and we needed the rain, but everyday for the last week? Really? I was beginning to feel like Noah and could not wait for the rainbow to appear! Today was the day. I woke up to a beautiful sunrise and spent most of the day outdoors. I set up my writing area on the back porch and did not want to go back inside away from the sunshine. As I sat reflecting on the week, I smiled as I thought of all the times I would “just miss” the rain as I walked from one class to another. I laughed at myself when I found my rain jacket in my “secret” compartment in my backpack…clearly secret! Yet through all the showers, my lifted spirit could not be put down. It is just as God promised us with His covenant, we will never again suffer through the destruction of all life or the wrath of God. “Whenever I bring clouds over the earth and the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will remember my covenant between me and you and all living creatures of every kind” (Genesis 9:13-14, NIV). As I sat in the sunshine after the week long rain, I felt comforted by God’s everlasting covenant.
A perfect message at the perfect time
Even though I see God working in my everyday life and the lives of others, I continue to be amazed every time it happens. This week has been a whirlwind with the writing conference. By the time the day is done I am inspired and encouraged and EXHAUSTED! Our worship leaders are unmatched and their personal story is nothing short of inspiring. The classes have provided affirmation on God’s path for me as well as opened doors to follow on projects. I miss my family and I rarely take time to do something for just me-this was the week. Today I scheduled my pitch to the one publisher I selected out of the many available. You have 15 minutes to pitch your project in order to spark enough interest that they want to see more. I selected this publisher by looking at their faculty website, I had not met the editor/representative prior to this conference. At the conference, you select courses that interest you and the “How to write a transformational Bible Study” intrigued me. I have previously shared how my relationship with God grew through my teaching of our neighborhood and church Bible studies. I danced around the idea of maybe writing my own Bible Study one day, so I signed up. The instructor was the same individual that I would be pitching later in the week. I have officially become a “bible nerd”. This class continued to drive me to want to dig deeper into the word and to share the passion for God’s word to others. Wow-I could not wait to get to this class everyday. As the days passed, I knew I wanted to work with her on my first book project.