Which way do I go?
The great thing about seeing God in all things is that you see God in all things. The tough part of seeing God in all things is being able to discern what is of God versus what is my personal hope/influence or when I am reading and seeing what is not truly there or from God. Yesterday was one of those days for me. I felt convicted that I knew where God was leading me. I had a plan and was getting ready to execute it…and then I received an email. That email made me question if I was truly listening to God, truly hearing Him. I went through all the logical steps of evaluating a decision as I have been trained to do for years in the military. I recognized where emotion may be influencing a desired end that is not guaranteed. I recognized the emotional pull for each path and then I said yes to one, my daughter heard the strain in my voice. I told my daughter that the strain in my voice was because I was thinking, I was praying. I could not discern if the email message was received in that moment to guide me in a different direction. I began to doubt where I believed God wanted me to go. And then it happened, I received a text message and in that message all was made clear. A dear newfound friend recently sent me these verses and they have become my go to, “ Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him. and he will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5-6, NIV). I knew I was at a crossroads and I didn’t want my decision, my emotional desires to remove my trust in God or veer me off my straight path.
The Godwink in all this? The person that sent me the text message doesn’t normally send me messages. The person that sent me the text message didn’t tell me he was going to visit the location of my decision. The person that sent me the text message sent it in the exact moment when I said my decision out loud to my daughter. My perceived distance, the perceived pull away from my safe space was just that-the text message gave me fact that my safe space was still near. That’s a Godwink. I am thankful for answered prayers. I am thankful for God’s messengers that remove doubt. I am thankful for the ability to discern God’s truth over my emotional or personal desires.
I recently read in a social media post that the devil doesn’t want you to not believe in God, the devil wants you to feel like God has abandoned you. I had one of those moments yesterday, I doubted whether I ever heard God’s direction for me. I questioned if I was “seeing” and “hearing” God when He wasn’t there. In those moments, which we will all encounter, I encourage you to turn to God in prayer. He will remind you, just like He reminded me, He has not abandoned me. He even sent me a messenger!
I don’t know what tomorrow brings, none of us do. I do know that God has not abandoned me and regardless of what tomorrow brings, He has me.
Today, I pray that when you have moments of doubt, you turn to God in prayer and seek his discernment. I pray that you be open to His messengers on earth and continue on the straight path He has laid before you.
