Scales removed from my eyes
I am playing a little catch up this week. For the first time in a long time, I didn’t quite get my three blogs last week. This was one I intended to write last week that I didn’t want to forget. I have doubts-I think if we are all honest with ourselves, we have all had doubts at one time or another. I have been prayerful, but wondered if what I prayed for was not what God had planned for me. I have questioned whether transformation, true transformation was really possible. The other night as I sat in prayer and opened my Bible, it opened to Acts 9, and I had my answer. How can we doubt transformation when you read about Saul? Saul went from persecuting all the followers of Jesus to proclaiming the name of Jesus to all who would hear. That is transformation. God chose Him and when God chooses us, what seems impossible becomes possible. The lost are found and true transformation surpasses understanding. Saul was blinded by God questioning him and his acts of persecution only to then be given his site as he is transformed. “Brother Saul, the Lord-Jesus, who appeared to you on the road as you were coming here-has sent me so that yo may see again and be filled with the Holy Spirit.” Immediately, something like scales fell from Saul’s eyes, and he could see again” (Acts 9:17-18, NIV)
Back again-the Book of Job
I mentioned I have changed how I read the Bible? Each night I hold the Bible in my hands as I close the day in prayer and I pray for God to guide my hands and to speak to me. This new habit has pulled me in to not just reading a chapter or verse, but finding it difficult to set the Bible down. I am definitely in a season of hungering to learn more. Last night, as I sat in prayer, I open the Bible and it took me towards the end of Job, not the beginning, but the end. I read how God reminded Job that He is all powerful and reminds Job to not question Him. He reminds Job of His works. Finally, God restores Job with “his fortunes and gave him twice as much as he had before” (Job 42:10, NIV). In this season, I have read the Book of Job several times and compared to myself to Job as well as his friend. I have said that my life felt like the life of Job and then corrected myself, because as much as I am dealing with trials, I am still very much in a season of abundance. You see, I can dwell on the negative or I can recognize the blessings that God has and continues to provide.
Not about the likes
Have you ever sat in church and just knew that the entire message was directed at you? That was me this past weekend. The Godwink part of it? The night before I had shared with one of the twins that I needed to grow my platform and work on followers to appeal to publishers more. A sidebar-I do not use TikTok nor have I ever intended to do that but as I was talking to the girls, they shared that is where a lot of social media growth occurs. The pressures to have an established platform and email lists in order to appeal to traditional publishers can be overwhelming. As I sat in church, I realized that those pressures have the risk of negating why I write. In the same week I received multiple text messages encouraging me to continue writing my blog and affirmation how some are even now seeing Godwinks where they had not seen them before. Isn’t that why I write? It is not about followers, it is not about likes-as our Pastor shared this weekend, Heaven doesn’t care how many like you had here on earth. He shared about the unsung heroes in the Bible-those that didn’t even write a book or may not even be named. I loved his last point that Heaven celebrates people that the Earth did not see. Can you imagine that in the world we live in today? What if we all chose to use our ordinary faith to encourage the faith in others, no matter the cost to ourselves? Epaphroditus is the first unsung hero in our study. In Philippians, Paul mentions him and says he will send him back. He states he was ill but God had mercy on him. He suffered, paid a price, for his faith. Then Paul closes with this and reminds us of where and when we will see our greatest joy-it is not about followers or being liked here on Earth. “So then, welcome him in the Lord with great joy, and honor people like him, because he almost died for the work of Christ. He risked his life to make up for the help you yourselves could not give me” (Philippians 2:28-30, NIV) Honor people like him because of their faith in Christ, because of their quiet and behind the scenes willingness to risk their own lives for the work of Christ and good of others. I think I would prefer to be that kind of hero than one that is measured by the number of likes on social media.
Timely messages
Sometimes I am in the middle of a Godwink and don’t even realize it. Other times, it is evident from the start. The other day I was driving to Wilmington for military duty to promote an officer on the battleship. I knew it would be a beautiful day and something to witness. As I was driving for hours in the early morning, one of my retired Duke employees kept coming to mind. He lived in Wilmington, along with many other people I knew, but only his name would not leave my thoughts. I decided to send him a text message and see if he could join me or if we could meet for lunch. He responded immediately that he was in Virginia and would have to miss. His brother had gone in for emergency brain surgery the night before. The Godwink? I haven't spoken to him since he retired. Months have passed since we last connected. What are the odds that I would be driving down the road to Wilmington, a place I had not been to in many months, on that day and reach out to him at the exact time he needed prayer for him and his family? I shared the news with our old team and I immediately knew the prayer warriors would go into action, and they did. His brother is still in recovery but day by day he is getting better. As I chatted with my friend days later, I shared the same story and reminded him that only God makes those connections in the exact time and place when they are needed most. I reminded him he was not, and would never be alone and to reach out anytime. There are several version of Proverbs 25, the NIV states “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in network of silver” (Provers 25:11, ASV), but I think I like the Message version “The right word at the right time is like a custom-made piece of jewelry” (Proverbs 25:11, MSG).
A Jericho Rose
I don’t think I have been shy in sharing that it has been a difficult season at the same time that it has been a season of abundance. It doesn’t seem logical that I can be in both these seasons at the same time, but I am. This past weekend, I was cleaning my desk and picked up an old “Strength and Grace” devotional that mentioned a Jericho rose. This plant, although it may seem dead, comes back to life when it is placed in a little bit of water. In order for it to continue to live and survive, the water source has to be removed at least one day a week. In its dormant state, it can survive for years without water only to come back to life when the water source is provided. Its nickname is the resurrection plant. When I read this, I immediately went on Amazon and ordered it so it would arrive in time for Rob’s birthday celebration. Part of me wondered if it was real-if it would work. When I added water and watched it slowly come back to life, all I could think of is what an amazing symbol of rebirth, of resurrection. What once was dead or lost coming back to life with living water-spiritual rebirth that is found in our Father and the living water He provides. I have looked at this photo countless times today. I needed the reminder that if this plant can come back and be reborn, healing is possible in all of us. We may go through difficult seasons, or dry seasons, but it does not mean that a season of abundance is not coming. It does not mean that we cannot be reborn and thrive again. “At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit” (Titus 3:3-5, NIV)
“Can we skip to the good part?”
The girls and I had an amazing weekend in Colorado. Not only did we get to see a beautiful part of this amazing country, we were able to watch one of the girls’ favorite bands, AJR, performing at Red Rocks. We had an amazing weekend thrifting in the cutest little stores, ate amazing local food, floated down a river, hiked through Red Rocks, and ended the weekend with the high energy concert singing along to all our favorite songs. The girls introduced me to this band and I have come to love their lyrics. I previously blogged about their “100 bad days” song and this week, it is about “The Good Part”. One of the lines in the song is “Can we skip to the good part?” It’s how I feel multiple times throughout the day. I get it, I know it is God’s timing and not mine. I know I am supposed to trust God and I know that my path, my journey is ordained by God and not by me. But sometimes, I just want to skip to the good part. Don’t we all? As I sat there in these special moments this weekend, I realized I have been wanting to skip to the good part, but I was not seeing that I am living the good part right now. I don’t know about you, but when something is off, or not going right in my life, I have a tendency to focus on that one thing. This weekend was a reminder, thanks to these young artists, that I don’t need to skip to the good part, I am living the good part. A dear friend shared a verse that “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit” (Psalms 34:18, NIV). That’s what He did this weekend. I may be crushed in spirit, but he reminded me that He is close and He is here to save me and is doing it every moment of every single day.
When life gives you lemons…
I think we all know that saying, when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. How about what is meant for evil, God uses for good? Lately, I have had quite a few of those moments. It has me wondering and questioning if I ever had a time or a season that I did not have to constantly adjust my outlook on things. Maybe I naively ran full speed ahead and just ignored the little bumps in the road. Maybe, as I get older, I have just become more aware of these little distractions. This weekend was one of those distractions. We had a plan, and like so many other plans lately, things changed last minute. Truthfully, in the past, I probably would have responded more in anger and frustration, but after being in this season of turmoil and challenges, we simply make the best of what is handed to us. You know what happened? We had an amazing day-it might not have been the exact thing we planned, but it was a perfect day. “But Joseph said to them, “Don’t be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. So then, don’t be afraid. I will provide for you and your children.” And he reassured them and spoke kindly to them” (Genesis 50:19-21, NIV) So many stories in the Bible have individuals going through a season or seasons of challenges. The story of Joseph is one of my favorite stories of perseverance. It defines how God turns what was meant for evil to good. He was not only betrayed by his own brothers and sold into slavery, he was also falsely imprisoned as the betrayal and lies continue in his life. He is then lifted to a seat of power in Egypt and becomes the one to save the lives of countless, to include the brothers that originally betrayed him.
Which way do I go?
The great thing about seeing God in all things is that you see God in all things. The tough part of seeing God in all things is being able to discern what is of God versus what is my personal hope/influence or when I am reading and seeing what is not truly there or from God. Yesterday was one of those days for me. I felt convicted that I knew where God was leading me. I had a plan and was getting ready to execute it…and then I received an email. That email made me question if I was truly listening to God, truly hearing Him. I went through all the logical steps of evaluating a decision as I have been trained to do for years in the military. I recognized where emotion may be influencing a desired end that is not guaranteed. I recognized the emotional pull for each path and then I said yes to one, my daughter heard the strain in my voice. I told my daughter that the strain in my voice was because I was thinking, I was praying. I could not discern if the email message was received in that moment to guide me in a different direction. I began to doubt where I believed God wanted me to go. And then it happened, I received a text message and in that message all was made clear. A dear newfound friend recently sent me these verses and they have become my go to, “ Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him. and he will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5-6, NIV). I knew I was at a crossroads and I didn’t want my decision, my emotional desires to remove my trust in God or veer me off my straight path.
Where do you turn in sorrow, strife, and complaints?
My kids pick on me and a dear friend that even when we try to partake in the consumption of wine, we are epic failures. Today as one of the girls and I were at the grocery store, I asked out loud if I should grab a bottle of wine. Her response was to ask who was coming over, since I am horrible at drinking wine. I took a little joy in that observation, but I will admit, there have been days that I wished I could drown my sorrows and woes in the wine bottle. I eagerly sought for the numbing I see it provide others and found myself disappointed that more oftentimes than not it would lead to sleep, headaches, and a lack of relief of any kind. The fact is, turning to wine will never provide relief. I heard Proverbs 23 today and although I have read it in the past, I had not focused on the beginning. “Who has woe? Who has sorrow? Who has strife? Who has complaints? Who has heedless bruises? Who has bloodshot eyes?” (Proverbs 23:29, NIV) The fact is, we all do. Each of these questions describes all of us at any point in our lives. We have all felt loss, sorrow, and strife. We have all been bruised, complained and shed more tears than we can count. What God reminds us is that only He can fill that void, only He can fill that loss and emptiness we feel.
Lord help me with patience
I don’t know about you, but I am a fixer, and as a fixer I am not known for my patience. On any given moment, I am fully trusting and declare my readiness for God’s time and in the next moment, I am eager to help God along. Have you ever been in the same place? Patience is defined as the capacity to accept or tolerate delays, hardships, or frustrations calmly and without complaint. It illustrates perseverance, self control and the ability to endure the most difficult of times. David reminds us that we must anchor ourselves in God and in doing so, we can overcome anything. “I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord” (Psalms 27: 13-14, NIV). I recognize that I am in a season of refinement and my patience and trust in God will be strengthened on the other side of this.